Ghost Seviper
by Das Machmobil
Summary: I am a pepper enthusiast. Ergo, I wrote this in honor of the Naga Viper Pepper, one of the hottest peppers in the world. Pairing: Brock X Lucy  Note: story contains a cameo appearance by Super Mario.
1. Heat Index: 11 out of 10

I'm back! Anyways, this is a tribute to one of the hottest chili peppers in the world: the Naga Viper. I encourage you to punch it in on Google.

This is a Luck-shipping one-shot, only this time it has a twist.

Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, Super Mario, or the Naga Viper, but I wish I did. All credits go to the following:

Pokemon: Satoshi Tajiri, Ken Sugimori, Game Freak, Nintendo, and P-USA

Super Mario: Shigeru Miyamoto and Nintendo

Naga Viper: Gerald Fowler (pepper-producing maestro)

O.O

"Damn. It's hotter than a magma chamber out here," muttered Lucy. She was currently watering her pepper plants in her garden. She wasn't used to 90+ degrees Fahrenheit, though it was perfect weather for her pepper plants and pineapple bushes. Speaking of pineapple bushes…

"You can come out Brocko." Lucy hollered towards a pineapple bush where Brock was hiding.

"How did you know it was me?" Brock sheepishly responded.

"It's a piece of cake. I can always recognize you and those beautiful eyes of yours," replied Lucy. She was sporting a black Rolling Stones T-shirt with a long beige skirt.

"Um what is that?" Brock pointed his finger at a purplish habanero-like chili pepper.

"This is a Ghost Seviper Pepper. It is a hybrid produced from an Enigma Berry, a Spelon Berry, a Habanero pepper, a Scotch Bonnet pepper, a Bhut Jolokia Pepper, mustard, and horseradish."

"I never knew you were such a connoisseur with spices Lucy." Lucy smiled at Brock's comment.

"My Seviper devours these peppers on a regular basis; they enhance her Flamethrower when she's up against Steel-type Pokemon. You're welcome to try them if you want, but I warn you: it is not candy. I ate one yesterday and it burnt a hole in my stomach. Noland and Tucker had surgery on their esophagi after eating them."

Brock took Lucy's advice … well sort of. He ate only _half_ of the pepper.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" Brock unleashed a giant fireball at the nearest tree and reduced it to ashes. He then torched 80% of Lucy's pepper garden with a Flamethrower.

Lucy blushed at Brock's reaction and puffy lips. "Have some Moo Moo Milk Brocko. It'll nullify the effects of the capsaicin." Brock snatched the cup of Moo Moo Milk from Lucy's hand and emptied it in one gulp.

"How do you feel now? I told you it was spicy." Lucy told Brock as her Milotic put out the flames.

"I feel much better. Now I know how Ash felt when he ate a Tamato Berry, although this felt like eating 40 of them in less than a minute." He then noticed that Lucy's plants were burnt into charcoal. "Uh, I'm sorry about your pepper plants Lucy."

Lucy chuckled. "You have nothing to be sorry about Brocko. If anything, I am thankful that you reduced my workload. These pepper gardens can be quite a burden, and I already plucked the peppers off of them and stored them." She then stood up and grabbed Brock's arm.

"Come on Brocko. Let's get some milkshakes to cool ourselves down."

2.718 seconds later, Mario appeared out of a vortex.

"Okey-dokey. Now where did Bowser send me?" Mario then noticed a Ghost Seviper Pepper lying next to her.

"Are those-a-mushrooms?" Mario popped the pepper into his mouth.

"Mario! Don't eat it! It burns!" Brock warned Mario in vain.

"MAMA! HOO HAH HOO! WHOA! WHOA!" Mario unleashed multiple fireballs into the air before jumping into a nearby lake and sucking it dry.

'Water only exacerbates the burn.' Lucy thought.

"Mama Mia! That's a spicy meat-a-ball!" Mario shouted as Lucy's Milotic refilled the lake.

"You said it Mario." Brock told him.

"I-a-am-a-out-a-here." Mario hopped into another vortex to return to Mushroom Kingdom.

Brock and Lucy went off to drink milkshakes.

**To be continued...**

N.B.: Capsaicin is the substance in spicy foods and chili peppers that burns the tongue.

Mario: You-a-are-a-flipping-a-sadist Lucy!

Lucy: Don't point your finger at me Mario! I didn't write this story! Besides, don't you understand that water only makes it worse?

Brock: If anything, Mach68 is the sadist.

Me: Whatever. I thought this story sucked.


	2. Even Hotter

Me: It turns out that an even hotter pepper exists.

Brock: You're kidding, aren't you?

Lucy: Negative Brocko; this pepper makes my peppers taste sweet.

Brock: Well count me out.

Me: Chicken.

Brock: Oh yeah? We'll you're a chicken with a forked tongue.

Lucy: Nice comeback Brocko.

Me: Whatever.

O.O

Brock and Lucy were sharing a giant milkshake.

"Ouch! Brain freeze!" Lucy clutched her forehead and groaned in pain.

"Are you OK Lucy?" Brock asked with concern.

"I'm fine, thank you. I just have a low tolerance for brain freeze," replied Lucy.

"You shouldn't gulp the milkshake down so fast. Try touching the roof of your mouth with your tongue." Sure enough, it worked.

"I love having a boyfriend as smart _and_ brave as you Brocko." Brock blushed at Lucy's words.

"I love having a pepper connoisseur as a girlfriend." Lucy returned the blush.

"You two certainly make a cute couple."

"Hello Anabel. I take it that you are here with Ash," said Lucy, drawing out a blush from Anabel and Ash.

"You got that right Lucy." Ash responded. "What's up Brocko? You must have eaten something spicy."

"I'm recovering from a bout of the Ghost Seviper Pepper."

"You have guts Brocko. I dare you to try the Trinidad Drapion." Ash said jokingly.

"How hot is it?" Brock and Lucy asked Ash curiously.

"It renders the Ghost Seviper a sweet pepper. Pikachu and I even prepared for the side effects for the most part." Ash shivered as a flashback flooded his brain.

"_GAAAAH! Son of a piss-drinking Bellsprout!" Ash and Pikachu were writhing in pain. _

"_Are you alright Ash?" Anabel asked in worry. She then noticed a few peppers and four empty bottles of Moo Moo Milk lying on the ground. "How could you?"_

"_I didn't think they would burn a hole in my intestines! Besides, Pikachu and I downed 2 bottles of Moo Moo Milk each so it wouldn't burn our tongues!"Ash spluttered._

"The Trinidad Drapion induced a duodenal ulcer and ate through a blood vessel. I'm surprised that Pikachu and I didn't lose a lot of blood."

"Well Ash, I guess we all learned the hard way," said Brock casually.

"At least you can drink a milkshake. Ash has to wait another day before he can sip one," commented Anabel.

"Pikachu has it worse. His ulcer was more severe than mine; he can't swallow an ounce of ketchup for 2 weeks," Ash added.

"Chuuu…" (Crap.)

The waiter delivered another giant milkshake to Brock and Lucy.

Ash's eyes widened. "And I thought I was the one who ate like a Snorlax," he muttered.

"Queen Lucia Thistle! That is your fourth milk shake! You're going to have a stomach ache!" The voice came from Lucy's student Barbara.

Lucy gave Barbara an annoyed look. "First of all, I told you not to call me Queen Lucia. I am not a queen, and Lucia is too pompous for me. Second, I didn't say I was going to drink this milkshake."

Barbara was about to ask before noticing that Lucy's Seviper and Brock's Croagunk were sharing the milkshake.

"That seems fair enough, but I still can't comprehend how you and Brock can gulp down two Gargantuan Shakes, much less three."

"Oh suck it up Barbara. We all know that you would do the same," replied Lucy. "Besides, my appetite does match my size."

"Sorry Lucy, but I forgot how _tall_ you were." Barbara stated somewhat sarcastically.

"It's okay Barbara. I wish I was shorter though; being a 6 foot 4 woman is not easy," Lucy replied calmly.

Brock's jaw dropped. It never occurred to him how tall Lucy was. He stood at a respectable 5 foot 10 inches, but men are usually taller than women according to status quo (Ash stood 5 foot 8.5, while Anabel stood 5 foot 6).

The height difference did not bother Brock, and it sure as hell did not bother Lucy. Lucy preferred dating men who were shorter than her (i.e Brock).

"Are you okay Brocko?" Lucy asked.

"Yea, I'm fine. I'm contemplating on whether or not I should try the Trinidad Drapion."

"What's a Trinidad Drapion?" Barbara asked Brock.

"It's the hottest pepper known to mankind; far hotter than the Ghost Seviper." Lucy answered.

"Have you tried one?" Barbara asked Brock and Lucy.

"No, but we'll find out tomorrow." Brock and Lucy responded simultaneously.

"Well, good luck," wished Ash, Anabel, and Barbara.

**To be continued...**

Lucy: Can you make me shorter in your next story? I feel like a bean stalk.

Me: Fine. I'll make you 6 foot 2 in future stories. Is that better?

Lucy: That's better.


End file.
